Ashley, you are bigger than this whatever it is. I know from the few interactions we’ve had and the interesting life you appear to lead. Whatever it is look inside your inner soul and capture the spirit from within. If you can fix it then try. If not, don’t blame yourself, but rather learn to accept, as you cannot be responsible for others’ lives.
I work on me the whole time. By working on me I know I tried my best. Whether I win or fail I learn something. My accomplishments are continuous whether I win or lose. The key to inner comfort and satisfaction is knowing you have tried your utmost. If others don’t see it then that’s their problem.
I’ve had many failures in my life. Some have taken years to overcome. Now I realize we cannot be responsible all the time if we have tried. We need to put those emotions to the side and be strong. Use our mind to control our emotions and appreciate the great person we are regardless of what others might be thinking.
In my book, you most definitely are a wonderful person. Someone who can express her feelings, a person who cares, a human being that deserves to find a solution. It’s locked in your three brains (1) head, (2) heart, and (3) gut. Go with the intuitional flow of moving on and taking control to a more robust individual with wings to charter new territory; the deeper inner self of your glowing personality.
Lastly but not least accept whatever it is that has happened. You will become a better person.
Prof. Carl Boniface
intuitional flow (n) = intuition is the capacity to make decisions and create new ideas without conscious deliberation. Flow is the optimal experience where action becomes automatic and conscious thought seems to meld together with the action itself.