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Naughty Boys

Today’s short English written article is about commonly used words by British subjects. Dictionary below! It is useful, as most English courses avoid certain wording because it may be considered beneath the threshold of well-spoken English. However, the peoples’ language must be heard. Read it at your own peril.

Malcolm’s stomach was detoxifying, or at least he had thought so before he had to rush back to the bog. He couldn’t stop crapping! It wasn’t diarrhea in the conventional sense as he still managed to extract urine via his pee-pee. Perhaps it was something he had eaten, or then it could have been the crap he had scoffed after the pub crawl that him and his mates had gone on. They loved Friday night binges!

Two of his mates had gone out with him to how many pubs, he couldn’t remember, but he could remember knocking back the pints of beer, one after another. He probably had shared well over thirty to forty pints with the lads, considering their pub crawl had taken them from Epsom all the way to Wallington, Surrey, and they had visited at least eight or nine establishments. Brits love to have a good piss up!

Either way, he felt awful. Strange, he thought, as he hadn’t vomited. According to his mum food poisoning would usually encourage an unsettled stomach which would mean spewing one’s guts up. She thought it could have been a virus. Viruses usually cause an upset bowel but without the puke.

Saturday was spent recuperating from Friday night’s overindulging and slap-up vindaloo and garlic nan bread from the local Indian cuisine curry house. 24-hours later he was back on track to his normal self.

Written by Carl Boniface

Vocabulary builder:

The bog (n) = 1.wet muddy ground too soft to support a heavy body. 2. British informal, the toilet

Crapping (v) = gagando, in the UK used to talk at length in a foolish or boring way.

Pee-pee = xixi, a child's word for an act of urinating. Also, it can mean urine or penis.

Pub crawl = (n) a tour taking in several pubs or bars, with one or more drinks at each. (v) go on a pub crawl. "he liked to pub-crawl with his mates"

Spewing (v) = vomiting, ejecting, spew out, discharging, disgorging

Spew your guts (v) = 1. (slang) to speak truthfully and share everything one knows about something, especially a sensitive issue or a wrong one has committed. “Come on, spew your guts” In other words, a mother wants to hear whatever her kids are plotting. (slang) To vomit violently and lengthily.

Puke (n) = vomit

Piss up (n) = vulgar expression for a bout of heavy drinking. binge, tear, bout, bust, an occasion for excessive eating or drinking; "they went on a bust that lasted three days".

Binges (n) plural of binge which means to overindulge by drinking too much, as in the text. (syn) benders, rampages, overdoes, indulges, overindulges.

Slap-up (adj) = informal British (of a meal or celebration) large and sumptuous. "a slap-up dinner"

Vindaloo (n) = highly spiced hot Indian curry.

Nan bread (n) = a round flat leavened bread especially of the Indian subcontinent

P.S. If you want to practice your spoken English with me, don't be shy. You can reach me by WhatsApp from anywhere in the world. Let's set up online classes. +55-11-97607-6871

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